i'm touched today. again - when i heard my fren telling his story.
i din share his experience in that sense, but i noe wat it takes for one to narrate a story like that.
i like to read and watch movies. i hav come across ideas, plots, dramas, and stories which r much more majestically tragic than that.
but when some one u cared sincerely shared his/her heart and soul, the impact, as a human would feel, is much more thorough than any films could arouse.
i was pumped with all sorts of unidentical feelings running in my veins when i got his stories and were literally stunned for a few sec.
i really was and am still sorry to hear that. i really am.
i hope i were bttr help. but as a fren, i'm happy to c him stayin strong and lookin at things on the bright side. equally happy for him to share his experience with me, jus like how i'm learnin to share my feelings with other ppl more. for(the very fact) i'm able to feel the friction, perhaps a lil more than others.
i shall treasure all the kids in my family (which are a sudden boom lately). i like them so much, and therefore i could relate to imagine ur loss my fren. thr's no end to learn to appreciate everything one has in life. i think i'm really living a lil more through the words i play with now.
my frens, i'm feeling u more than i could, as my life experience is enriched by the day.
i seldom pray. but my sincerest prayers are with the newborn.
i would be equally happy should he live a happy, healthy and fulfilling life.
i shall pray with the emotions and wishes i have for my own sis, nieces and nephews, for the blessings upon the kid. i'm not sure wat good it does, but i certainly hope it helps in one way or another, directly or indirectly.
i have seen a mirror of life in a day. two sides of it. its also the full month celebration of my niece.
glad that ur hanging tough. gambatte my fren. bonnuit.
good nite and good luck.
ad
p/s- i'm not sure if u mind me posting this, hence the conscious effort to try to retract from detailing ur story too much. hope its not crossing wat it should hav been. pls let me noe if i had crossed the line, for i would be more than willing to edit wherever inapproprite.
Saturday, January 20, 2007
Monday, January 15, 2007
RIW(12-15/01/07)-Charlie the Champ not the Chimp~!
yaha~~~we survived the camp!
well it was certainly an awesome experience. glad that i had my teammates with me, equally happy with the facilitators assigned to us, and the game design, and the organizin comm, n etc ...
i will not (i hope lol, n i hope we shan't) forget :
singing outloud hakuna matata, negaraku n some other incredibly stupid if not childish songs hikin up hill :P ;
soaking in the river together n doing other stupid things that one can do at the river with imagination ;
whoop it up with the group cheer religiously, even when time does not allow that :P ;
sliding , falling, tripping in style(at times ugly, o lord i hav neva fallen so many times a day in my life for my sense of balancing is at least average if not good :P) ;
and having a hole at my ass(o yea the ass whipping hot sensation);
and wearing mud all over, at times even munching mud;
and being saved by xin all the time;
and listening to steve saying i cant take this no more throughout the trek but neva quit (ur my man bro~!) ;
pinching or being pinched at my face and being slapped becuz of mozzies that din exist ;
doing the penguin warm up routine together after near-frozen experience (yea rivers arent always comfy :P, for such emotional lovers they are);
being fully awake watching the trees n the sky on the 1st nite while others r slp'g sweetly(while prayin hard that the staff come n wake us up asap);
slp'g so close to each other that leon's face was jus 50 milimeter rite in front of mine if i turned inward (datz so geli, n so brokeback ;P) ;
playing games that i hav no clue at all while a sea of voices from the kids saying that yea i played this b4, we should... ;
fooling around with absurd ideas of fundraising (all the time) ;
doin the thai accent shit talkin about ping pong party 200 bath and ended with sowatdeekrap :P trying the tests together (and failing too :P) ;
sharing a chocolate bar on the bus :P ;
who are we ;
what are we ;
CHARLIE ;
man u kids hav got no idea wat u hav done to(enrich) my life (positively)
n man u wont hav a clue how much i hav learned from u
i sincerely hope that u'll be blessed with fulfilling years ahead of u
who are me? CHARLIE~
what are we? THE CHAMP
Charlie!!
Charlie Charlie Chit Bom Bom
Wuuuuuu~~~~Ahhh~
with warmest regards
yaha~~~we survived the camp!
well it was certainly an awesome experience. glad that i had my teammates with me, equally happy with the facilitators assigned to us, and the game design, and the organizin comm, n etc ...
i will not (i hope lol, n i hope we shan't) forget :
singing outloud hakuna matata, negaraku n some other incredibly stupid if not childish songs hikin up hill :P ;
soaking in the river together n doing other stupid things that one can do at the river with imagination ;
whoop it up with the group cheer religiously, even when time does not allow that :P ;
sliding , falling, tripping in style(at times ugly, o lord i hav neva fallen so many times a day in my life for my sense of balancing is at least average if not good :P) ;
and having a hole at my ass(o yea the ass whipping hot sensation);
and wearing mud all over, at times even munching mud;
and being saved by xin all the time;
and listening to steve saying i cant take this no more throughout the trek but neva quit (ur my man bro~!) ;
pinching or being pinched at my face and being slapped becuz of mozzies that din exist ;
doing the penguin warm up routine together after near-frozen experience (yea rivers arent always comfy :P, for such emotional lovers they are);
being fully awake watching the trees n the sky on the 1st nite while others r slp'g sweetly(while prayin hard that the staff come n wake us up asap);
slp'g so close to each other that leon's face was jus 50 milimeter rite in front of mine if i turned inward (datz so geli, n so brokeback ;P) ;
playing games that i hav no clue at all while a sea of voices from the kids saying that yea i played this b4, we should... ;
fooling around with absurd ideas of fundraising (all the time) ;
doin the thai accent shit talkin about ping pong party 200 bath and ended with sowatdeekrap :P trying the tests together (and failing too :P) ;
sharing a chocolate bar on the bus :P ;
who are we ;
what are we ;
CHARLIE ;
man u kids hav got no idea wat u hav done to(enrich) my life (positively)
n man u wont hav a clue how much i hav learned from u
i sincerely hope that u'll be blessed with fulfilling years ahead of u
who are me? CHARLIE~
what are we? THE CHAMP
Charlie!!
Charlie Charlie Chit Bom Bom
Wuuuuuu~~~~Ahhh~
with warmest regards
Thursday, January 04, 2007
2007-The Irony, the Hope and the Alacrity
Thr’s always a thing with great irony/apparent contrast. At least to me.
In close to absolute silence, my heart speaks loudest.
But, however loud my heart speaks, she did/does not stop me.
To run from fear, and to fear of runs.
Run is the undesired manifestation of a gratifying pull-I run away from what pulls me towards it.
Probably that’s why I have a thing for irony, especially cynical contrasts that reflect themselves upon my action opposite to my feelings.
But wat on earth m I doing while my heart speaks? And when my mind answers to that?
A simple answer : …?
Lol, like I hav always said, I dun need to drink to get drunk ya :P
Lol perhaps feeling the new year, pondering about wat she brings.
Flashing back 2006, or even years before that wheneva relevant; like how ur linked to the archive of Iraq when u read about Saddam; like tasting a glass of wine after meal, not thinking anything n yet ur mind gets wild like a drunken mustang. Especially true for a person with a hyperactively jumpy mind, like the scattered sparklets of the firework I saw that said hi to 2007. Voila. Across the globe, almost everyone, and every mind and every heart wishes for a better year. The wishes invited Tsunami last year and 8 bombs this year. Probably Saddam’s execution answers to some Kurd’s or Shiite’s wish, but arguably is a milestone of a bttr year. I just could not help but to compare the dazzling fireworks that shone above me and the fireworks that took place on the ground in Bangkok and in many places of military conflicts. I made my resolution n wished for the bttr when I was visually showered by the amusing beauty of the firework; but what would I have thought n done if I was in the latter scenario?
And again my mind is scattered, at some point hollow, maybe because I can’t bear the scarce probability of another wish (dream) comes true. Yea sometimes ppl do wish for something too good to be true. That is why when a wish erects upon the rays of hope; it leaves behind a shadow of grope. Still, in fear I hope, in hope I fear.
We, the ppl, crave for peace and happiness since Adam, or the Great Ape; but yet somehow always stuck in bloodswamps for various reasons. like the troops in iraq.
N so many other significant members making major decisions that could affect the world unwillingly, yea n I meant getting addicted to youtubes lol
I’m glad that I hav yet another safe year last year. I’m still alive, in one piece, w functional brain n body (yea esp certain parts :P), a complete family, caring friends and ignorant bastards m yada yada, wat can be bttr? Seriously, datz all I need to live on. Do I always think lk that? No. especially when I hav an argument w my sis :P but at least I do think about that yaha. Last year has been very rich tho quiet as in it let me see so many things so clearly. Its surprisingly, excitingly pleasant when ur able to see things with perceivably great clarity, tho sometimes it flickers across my mind that it would be great if I could see through things literally lol. Personally, I enjoy the irony in me no more. It makes me an interesting individual tho. Hope I’ll get rid of that pretty soon. And I will. Making that an agenda this year, I have become happier a man :P
On another note I wanna sincerely thank all my precious friends for being who they are. They would never realized that a thing they say sometimes does make me think(sometimes more than twice). Never would they know as well, how much they have helped when I dwelt too much into depression and self-doubt, through just the normal things we do- jogging, talking crap, working out, blogging, having a drink together or just being there with me, or even jus knowing that u cared when I could have ‘phantomized’ my existence even more. I owe my happiness to u guys n my family as well.
Perhaps the tone of the writing is deceiving in a way that I have been living an absolutely hakuna matata life. Like I have told many of my frens, I have been living like a retiree even when I have not started working permanently in my life. Probably after a few days of intensively celebrative days, I’m feeling the relative downs despite of still being happy.
I have learned with life that happiness is really potent in every single thing in life, after I have felt it in every thing I do recently. Lying in the sofa doing nothing, cooking with my sis, doing grocery shopping w my sis or frens, doing weight training at home, reading, having something to eat when hungry, having some frens around when I dun feel lk being alone…they all make me peacefully happy. Tranquility has become another facet/façade of my source of happiness. (not sure if this is a sign ageing tho :P)
Welcoming the new year as well, I have figured out wat I want to do and where I want to be. The how process is difficult and might be another scarcely probable mission. However, knowing wat to do with known difficulty tho extreme, to me, is still better than not knowing wat to do. :P
The years begone have enriched me to come to realize that everything I have now is a bliss, n its evolving(for the bttr). It feels lk time is really a good filter that after time what is left is the best. It applies to interests, friends, personal credentials, individual character and perhaps quality of life too :P.
I hope u feel the same.
And that ur happy there.
And I love u.
All of u.
With alacrity, I’m laying my hopes for the best of u and of me and of everybody (who loves peace :P)
To the world, Adam is joining u very soon.
Bid myself a smooth sail ahead.
Cheerio.
2007, Bonjour~
p/s congrats guys for winning the world’s esl, wished I could be there tho :P
p/s 2, n yea i have a new niece born healthily yaha~~
Thr’s always a thing with great irony/apparent contrast. At least to me.
In close to absolute silence, my heart speaks loudest.
But, however loud my heart speaks, she did/does not stop me.
To run from fear, and to fear of runs.
Run is the undesired manifestation of a gratifying pull-I run away from what pulls me towards it.
Probably that’s why I have a thing for irony, especially cynical contrasts that reflect themselves upon my action opposite to my feelings.
But wat on earth m I doing while my heart speaks? And when my mind answers to that?
A simple answer : …?
Lol, like I hav always said, I dun need to drink to get drunk ya :P
Lol perhaps feeling the new year, pondering about wat she brings.
Flashing back 2006, or even years before that wheneva relevant; like how ur linked to the archive of Iraq when u read about Saddam; like tasting a glass of wine after meal, not thinking anything n yet ur mind gets wild like a drunken mustang. Especially true for a person with a hyperactively jumpy mind, like the scattered sparklets of the firework I saw that said hi to 2007. Voila. Across the globe, almost everyone, and every mind and every heart wishes for a better year. The wishes invited Tsunami last year and 8 bombs this year. Probably Saddam’s execution answers to some Kurd’s or Shiite’s wish, but arguably is a milestone of a bttr year. I just could not help but to compare the dazzling fireworks that shone above me and the fireworks that took place on the ground in Bangkok and in many places of military conflicts. I made my resolution n wished for the bttr when I was visually showered by the amusing beauty of the firework; but what would I have thought n done if I was in the latter scenario?
And again my mind is scattered, at some point hollow, maybe because I can’t bear the scarce probability of another wish (dream) comes true. Yea sometimes ppl do wish for something too good to be true. That is why when a wish erects upon the rays of hope; it leaves behind a shadow of grope. Still, in fear I hope, in hope I fear.
We, the ppl, crave for peace and happiness since Adam, or the Great Ape; but yet somehow always stuck in bloodswamps for various reasons. like the troops in iraq.
N so many other significant members making major decisions that could affect the world unwillingly, yea n I meant getting addicted to youtubes lol
I’m glad that I hav yet another safe year last year. I’m still alive, in one piece, w functional brain n body (yea esp certain parts :P), a complete family, caring friends and ignorant bastards m yada yada, wat can be bttr? Seriously, datz all I need to live on. Do I always think lk that? No. especially when I hav an argument w my sis :P but at least I do think about that yaha. Last year has been very rich tho quiet as in it let me see so many things so clearly. Its surprisingly, excitingly pleasant when ur able to see things with perceivably great clarity, tho sometimes it flickers across my mind that it would be great if I could see through things literally lol. Personally, I enjoy the irony in me no more. It makes me an interesting individual tho. Hope I’ll get rid of that pretty soon. And I will. Making that an agenda this year, I have become happier a man :P
On another note I wanna sincerely thank all my precious friends for being who they are. They would never realized that a thing they say sometimes does make me think(sometimes more than twice). Never would they know as well, how much they have helped when I dwelt too much into depression and self-doubt, through just the normal things we do- jogging, talking crap, working out, blogging, having a drink together or just being there with me, or even jus knowing that u cared when I could have ‘phantomized’ my existence even more. I owe my happiness to u guys n my family as well.
Perhaps the tone of the writing is deceiving in a way that I have been living an absolutely hakuna matata life. Like I have told many of my frens, I have been living like a retiree even when I have not started working permanently in my life. Probably after a few days of intensively celebrative days, I’m feeling the relative downs despite of still being happy.
I have learned with life that happiness is really potent in every single thing in life, after I have felt it in every thing I do recently. Lying in the sofa doing nothing, cooking with my sis, doing grocery shopping w my sis or frens, doing weight training at home, reading, having something to eat when hungry, having some frens around when I dun feel lk being alone…they all make me peacefully happy. Tranquility has become another facet/façade of my source of happiness. (not sure if this is a sign ageing tho :P)
Welcoming the new year as well, I have figured out wat I want to do and where I want to be. The how process is difficult and might be another scarcely probable mission. However, knowing wat to do with known difficulty tho extreme, to me, is still better than not knowing wat to do. :P
The years begone have enriched me to come to realize that everything I have now is a bliss, n its evolving(for the bttr). It feels lk time is really a good filter that after time what is left is the best. It applies to interests, friends, personal credentials, individual character and perhaps quality of life too :P.
I hope u feel the same.
And that ur happy there.
And I love u.
All of u.
With alacrity, I’m laying my hopes for the best of u and of me and of everybody (who loves peace :P)
To the world, Adam is joining u very soon.
Bid myself a smooth sail ahead.
Cheerio.
2007, Bonjour~
p/s congrats guys for winning the world’s esl, wished I could be there tho :P
p/s 2, n yea i have a new niece born healthily yaha~~
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